


The Long Walk Down A Short Hallway

by yeska_noka



Category: HiHi Jets (Band), Johnny's Entertainment, Johnny's Jr.
Genre: First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff and Smut, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:55:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27917110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeska_noka/pseuds/yeska_noka
Summary: When Igari brings a questionable video to practice, Mizuki finds himself with an opportunity.He's got one chance, and it's only going to cost him his dignity.
Relationships: Hashimoto Ryo/Inoue Mizuki
Kudos: 10





	The Long Walk Down A Short Hallway

“Like what the hell?!” Igari says, shoving his phone toward them so they can all see the screen. 

On it, two boys are making out, clutching each other and clinging and kissing and-- 

“Who _does_ that?” Igari continues. “It’s totally not normal!”

Mizuki prays that he’s not blushing and forces what he hopes is a neutral expression onto his face. The video was hot as hell, but clearly he’s the only one who thinks so, judging by the scandalized comments around him. 

“In front of people, even!” Yuto says, and Igari smacks his arm. 

“It’d be worse if they were doing it _not_ in front of people though? Like at least it’s clearly a joke.”

Sakuma is shaking his head back and forth. “Nope. Nope.”

Mizuki isn’t sure what he’s saying no to, and clearly Igari isn’t either, because he ignores him. 

“Even if the girls are all excited by it, who’s seriously going to do that, though? It’s _weird_!”

“It’s just like fanservice, isn’t it?” Ryo says, and Mizuki realizes it’s the first comment he’s made. Ryo’s face looks just about as neutral as Mizuki’s, or at least unbothered. Mizuki wonders what he’s thinking. Although he’s probably just said it. Fanservice, huh. 

Mizuki waits until the other three are done yelling over each other. “Isn’t it, though?” he says once he thinks he’ll be heard without raising his voice. “Just like fanservice?”

Yuto snorts. “You guys have just been here way too long.”

“Maybe,” Mizuki concedes, but something inside him makes him want to argue the point. “But fans like it when we touch each other and stuff, right? The magazines always make us do cutesy shoots or even sexy ones where they want us all over each other, so it sells, clearly. You all do it.”

“Because we get _paid_ to,” Igari fires back, and Sakuma just nods a bunch more. 

“You were trying to strip half our costumes off in the summer shows,” Mizuki points out. “No one told you to do that. You just like it when people are screaming for you. And,” he emphasizes, “it’s not like you could even _hear_ it this time, _so_.” 

Igari just gets all blustery as he does, and Mizuki knows he’s won. But Igari’s not the type to admit defeat easily. 

“Because there’s no difference between showing a little skin on stage and making out with your friend in public?”

Mizuki shrugs, and Yuto snickers. There’s a big difference, but in essence, it’s an attention grab either way.

“So you’d be fine just like, making out with one of us or something?” Igari pushes. Sakuma’s eyes go wide and he tilts his head back to stare at something on the ceiling. 

“I would if it were Mizuki,” Ryo says suddenly, and Mizuki blinks at him, feeling the blush trying to crawl its way back onto his face. It’s an unexpected statement, since no one was really asking him, and Mizuki has no idea how to respond. His mind is already helpfully conjuring thoughts of Ryo kissing him and he feels like the room has gotten at least five degrees warmer. It’s a struggle to focus on the conversation. 

The others are all laughing at Ryo’s absurdity, but Ryo looks like he doesn’t really get the joke, smiling vaguely. “Because he’s cute,” he adds, like that might help the situation, and Mizuki is _definitely_ blushing now. 

Yuto is the first to manage something coherent. “And what does Mizuki-kun think about that?”

Mizuki- _kun_ thinks he’d rather crawl into a hole and die than tell them the answer to that question, but stronger than his embarrassment is his pride. He tries to roll with it and not let them see how they’re getting to him. “Sure, I’d kiss Hashimocchan,” he ends up saying, not entirely in control of his mouth. “He’s hot.”

Yuto hoots at that, and Igari is equally loud, and Sakuma is alternatively nodding and shaking his head, saying “Right? Right? Right?” repeatedly. And then suddenly Igari turns his laser-sharp focus back on him and Mizuki feels his stomach drop. He knows he’s made a mistake even before Igari speaks. 

“Go on, then,” Igari says. “Show us.”

“ _Now_?” Mizuki hates the way his voice sounds so obviously nervous. He has a chance to finally kiss Ryo, and it’s in front of everyone? 

“Yeah, now. Since it’s no big deal, right?” 

Mizuki hates Igari more than a little at that moment, but then he realizes Ryo’s stepped closer to him and his heart rate spikes to sprinting levels. 

“Is it okay?” Ryo asks softly, his voice low as it often is, and Mizuki sort of hates him too, because there’s no way he can say no to him. Even like this. He does his best to keep it casual. 

“Sure,” is all he says, and then Ryo steps into his personal space. 

Yuto is already hollering as Ryo wraps an arm around Mizuki’s shoulder and pulls him in. 

“Okay?” he asks, and he’s leaning in as Mizuki answers. 

“Yeah,” he manages, and then Ryo kisses him. 

Ryo _kisses him_. Just like in the video. He wraps his hand around the back of Mizuki’s neck to pull him into place, and it’s not gentle or sweet. It’s _hot as anything_ , and Mizuki struggles to keep up. He gets his hands up in Ryo’s hair, maybe to pull him back a little, but he can’t focus on anything but the feel of Ryo’s mouth on his and he ends up just holding on. Dimly he’s aware of the other members hollering in the background, but his entire world has narrowed just to Ryo. His eyes have closed without conscious thought, and he kisses Ryo back with his whole being.

Ryo’s hand slides up the back of his shirt, the hand on Mizuki’s neck shifting down to his shoulder, and he pulls Mizuki tight against him. Mizuki gasps at the feel of it and Ryo takes the opportunity to suck on his lower lip. He nips at him, soothes the sting of it away with his tongue, and Mizuki just clings to him, lost. His lips have never felt so sensitive before. He’s hyper-focused on the feel of Ryo’s mouth moving against his, the way his lips press and slide along his own, the way his teeth graze Mizuki’s lip again from the force of their kiss. 

And then just as suddenly as it started, Ryo pulls away. Mizuki is dazed, head spinning, and he doesn’t want to open his eyes. He just focuses on trying to catch his breath, and realizes that maybe he should let go of Ryo… but then the sounds of Yuto and Igari catcalling and even Sakuma making noises of shock reach his ears and Mizuki just turns to bury his head against Ryo’s shoulder, not wanting to face them at all. 

Ryo - beautiful, kind Ryo - curls one arm around Mizuki’s head and his other around his shoulder and tucks him close, protective. Mizuki breathes in his scent and decides that he’ll just stay here forever.

But that’s obviously not an option. 

“So, Mizuki-kun, how was it?” Igari wants to know, and Mizuki thinks he might punch him if he looks at his face, so he just stays where he is and mumbles his answer into Ryo’s neck. 

“... it was really good.”

There’s more catcalling for a moment, and then the same question is presented to Ryo. 

“It was hot,” Ryo says easily, and he sounds confident despite the teasing the other members are throwing at them. He runs fingers gently through Mizuki’s hair, and Mizuki hates the world a little less.

\-------------------------------------

It’s been a few weeks since the kissing fiasco, as Mizuki mentally calls it, and he can’t get it out of his head. Nobody else brings it up again; to them it was a stupid little joke, something to get worked up over for ten minutes and then promptly forget. 

But Mizuki can’t forget. Every time he sees Ryo, every time he looks at him, he remembers. The details are embedded in his mind - the strength of Ryo’s fingers against his neck, the feel of his lips, the slide of his tongue… He’d told the others it was really good, but that doesn’t even begin to cover it. Kissing Ryo was _mind blowing_ , and Mizuki wants nothing more than to feel it all again. He can’t stop thinking about it.

And he can’t stop thinking about Ryo. Did he feel nothing? He’d said it was hot. Was that just words? Just a moment of fun? Did it mean anything to him? Does he keep thinking about it, too? Mizuki can’t stand being alone with this - is he the only one agonizing over the whole thing? 

Eventually, he can’t take it anymore. Mizuki asks Ryo to wait for him after rehearsal and as always, Ryo agrees. 

“What’s up?” he asks, once the others have left and they’re alone. 

Mizuki drops himself into a chair, a tense bundle of nerves, and then motions for Ryo to take a seat next to him. 

“So… about the other day,” he starts, and the way Ryo’s expression immediately changes tells Mizuki that he knows exactly what he’s talking about. 

Ryo looks like he’s been suckerpunched in the gut, sort of sick and shocked, and Mizuki instantly feels his stomach churn in upset sympathy. That wasn’t the reaction he was hoping for at all. But Ryo speaks before he can say anything. 

“I’m so sorry,” Ryo tells him. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

Mizuki blinks. “I… what?”

“You didn’t want to, right? You— it wasn’t, um… like, I pressured you. You were upset.” 

“No, you— I mean, yes, but… wait.” Mizuki is equally lacking in eloquence, trying to figure out what part of Ryo’s statement he’s even responding to. He takes a deep breath and tries to focus on the most important parts. 

“It’s not that I didn’t want to,” he explains. “I just didn’t want to _in front of them_.”

“But it would be weirder to do it _not_ in front of them, Garry-san said.”

Trust Ryo to zero in on entirely the wrong point. Mizuki shakes his head. 

“It’s only weird if the point is to get attention. But it’s not weird if you just… want to.” 

“But you didn’t want to.”

Mizuki nearly sighs in frustration. “Ryo. I kissed you back.”

Ryo looks away from him. “Yeah, but…”

“But _what_?”

“I don’t… know. I mean, you’re, like. A professional.”

Mizuki just waits for Ryo to make sense. 

“You do everything one-hundred percent,” Ryo explains. “So I thought… I don’t know. If you were going to, you know… like acting?”

Not that Mizuki’s confessed to a lot of people, but this is by far the most awkward it’s ever been. He almost wants to laugh.

“Ryo, I really wouldn’t kiss anyone else like that.” He waits until Ryo looks at him. “And I’m only upset with you for one reason.”

Ryo’s half-relieved expression falls back into one of concern, and Mizuki knows he’s on the right track.

“What’s… that?” Ryo asks hesitantly. 

“That you haven’t done it again,” Mizuki tells him, and steels himself to look Ryo straight in the face. 

It takes longer than Mizuki would like, but the look that dawns on Ryo’s face as he finally gets it is worth it. 

“ _Mijuki_ ,” he breathes. He looks at him like Mizuki’s just performed some sort of miracle. After another moment, he reaches out slowly like he’s going to touch Mizuki’s face, and then stops, hand hovering centimeters from his cheek. 

Of course it’s all awkward, because Ryo is the only person that matters - the rest were just infatuations. And this is not. Ryo is his… 

_Best friend_ isn’t right. Mizuki doesn’t know what he is. No labels seem to quite fit. Ryo is just… his. Mizuki reaches out to take Ryo’s hand and presses it to his cheek. 

That seems to be the permission Ryo was looking for. He shifts to the edge of his chair and leans forward, and Mizuki closes his eyes. 

It couldn’t be more different from the last time. Ryo brushes a gentle kiss across his lips, feather light, leaving a tickle briefly in its wake until Ryo kisses him again. It’s soft and sweet, and unexpectedly full of feeling.

Mizuki pulls back so he can look at him. 

“Ryo…”

“I’ve thought about this, you know,” Ryo tells him.

“About what?”

“This. Us. Kissing you. I really wanted to. I tried— I mean. I’d thought about all the different ways…”

So it hadn’t been a spur of the moment thing. It wasn’t some new discovery. Ryo really did want him. Mizuki feels so happy that his heart hurts. 

“I hadn’t thought about that way,” Ryo continues. “Before it happened, I mean. But then there was the chance and I couldn’t— I had to take it. But I’m still sorry. It was selfish. You were embarrassed.”

Mizuki has forgiven him a hundred times over in his head. He can’t be upset when things have turned out like this. He tells Ryo as much. 

“But you—“

“Ryo,” Mizuki interrupts. “Shut up.” He leans in to kiss him again. 

Now that he knows Ryo isn’t going anywhere, Mizuki lets himself focus on the details. Ryo’s lips feel just as Mizuki had been remembering, but the way he moves is so different. The way he fits his mouth to Mizuki’s is so careful, a perfect alignment as he presses Mizuki’s lower lip between his own. Mizuki can feel the way he breathes, hear the quiet sounds they make together in the silent room, and it’s so much more intimate than that first time. He can feel himself growing warmer and he’s sure he’s blushing; he wonders if Ryo can feel it. 

Eventually, leaning from his chair becomes a strain and Mizuki has to stand up. He does his best to pull Ryo with him because he doesn’t want to break their kiss for even a moment. It proves a little bit impossible, but Ryo follows him easily enough that they’re separated only for a second, and then he has Ryo even closer and it’s much more comfortable. He settles his hands on Ryo’s waist. 

Ryo cradles the back of his head, fingers brushing his neck, and Mizuki sighs into their kiss. Ryo uses his touch to guide him. There’s no urgency to this kiss, and no one watching, and Mizuki lets himself get lost in it. He loves the way they fit together, the way Ryo feels against him, the way their mouths move and the way Ryo smells. He loves the way Ryo touches his face, and how he traces a finger along the edge of Mizuki’s ear, sending a shiver coursing through him. He loves the way he can feel Ryo smile slightly against his mouth when Mizuki presses even closer against him. 

The kiss breaks naturally as they breathe, and Mizuki leans his forehead against Ryo’s, just enjoying being close to him like this. It’s still hard to believe it’s real. 

“You really wanted me,” he murmurs, like saying it out loud might make it sink in.

Ryo strokes his fingers gently through Mizuki’s hair. He speaks just as softly.

“If it meant I could finally kiss you, I would have done it on stage at Dome.”

“But all those people…”

“I wouldn’t have cared. Like... I’d be happy for everyone to know just how I feel about you.”

Mizuki is almost afraid to ask. “And how’s that?”

Ryo doesn’t say anything, but he kisses Mizuki again and Mizuki can feel his answer. He frames Mizuki’s face with his hands and Mizuki feels how he treasures him. Ryo kisses him again and again and again, and his heart is in every single one. 

Mizuki puts everything he has into kissing him back, and hopes Ryo can feel his heart, too. 

\-------------------------------------

The sudden loud ringing of his phone alarm going off makes Mizuki jump. It’s the one he always sets for late rehearsals - it means he’s got about five minutes to get out the door or he’ll miss his last train. He pulls it from his pocket and thumbs it off, and then turns back to Ryo. 

“You should go,” Ryo says, although he looks reluctant. Mizuki just leans back in. 

“Yeah,” he agrees, and then kisses Ryo again. 

After a minute or two, Ryo gently pushes him back, but then follows, still kissing Mizuki even as he tries to push him away. It’s entirely ineffective and counterproductive, and extremely cute. Mizuki smiles against his lips. 

And then he remembers why Ryo’s even trying to push him away in the first place. 

“ _Shit_ ,” he curses as he leans back. He glances at his watch and it’s _well_ past the five minutes his alarm allowed him. “Shit, shit, shit.” 

He grabs his bag and starts for the door, and then stops, looking back… 

“Go!” Ryo tells him, pointing at the door. 

Mizuki _runs_.

\-------------------------------------

The train doors close just behind him as he jumps onto the train. Mizuki collapses into a seat, the train half empty at this hour, and spends the first few minutes of the journey just trying to catch his breath. When he finally feels like he can breathe again and the lady across from him has stopped looking worried, he pulls out his phone. There’s a bunch of messages, but only one is from Ryo. Mizuki opens it and smiles. 

_I like you_.

\-------------------------------------

Rehearsal the next day starts as it normally does. The members gather in their dressing room first, and Ryo is already there with Sakuma when Mizuki arrives. He smiles at Mizuki and greets him as usual, and Mizuki echoes it, wondering if anyone will notice anything different between them. 

Once they’re all ready, Sakuma and Yuto go to drag out the large container holding their skates. Igari grabs his water bottle and heads after them, and Mizuki follows, Ryo trailing just behind. He’s nearly to the door when Ryo stops him with a hand on his elbow. 

“Mizuki…”

“Hmm?” Mizuki turns around just as Ryo leans in. 

The kiss is unexpected, but entirely welcomed. A little thrill goes through him at the idea of getting caught, and his nerves fizz as Ryo brushes his lips lightly across his own. 

“You guys coming?!” Igari yells from somewhere down the hall and Mizuki jumps. Ryo just smiles at his reaction. 

“We’re coming!” he calls back, and his hand is warm on Mizuki’s waist where he gently guides him through the doorway first. 

Mizuki’s heart soars at the reminder that this is a thing he can have - Ryo’s kisses all for himself, whenever he wants. 

And Mizuki wants them always. He finds himself cornering Ryo away from the others whenever he can, stealing kisses in secret moments, and it gets harder and harder to pull away. Mizuki just wants to be close to him, and compensates by touching Ryo in other ways - a light brush of their fingers under the table where no one will see, a gentle stroke along his collarbone under the pretense of helping him adjust his shirt mic. 

Ryo is indulgent. Ryo’s always been indulgent when it comes to Mizuki, and maybe that ought to have clued Mizuki in much, much earlier, now that he thinks about it. For his part, Ryo doesn’t act much differently, but that’s because he’s always treated Mizuki as special. He doesn’t try to kiss Mizuki in front of others, or even touch him any more than he ever did, and Mizuki knows it’s because Ryo understands that Mizuki’s not ready for anyone else to know. He’s pretty sure Ryo would be happy to publicly shower him with affection if Mizuki would just let him. But Mizuki dictates their pace and Ryo follows, and for now it’s a secret. 

Mizuki kisses him behind locked doors, around corners, hidden away from the others for brief moments, and he just wants _time_. 

So Mizuki waits after practice, dragging his feet and going through the motions of packing up his stuff as slowly as he can manage, until the other three are gone. Ryo waits for him, because he often waits for him, just so that they can walk out together. But today Mizuki doesn’t intend to go anywhere. He drops his bag back on the counter and moves toward Ryo, who looks confused. 

“Aren’t you leaving?”

It’s cute how he doesn’t get it, and Mizuki smiles. He takes Ryo’s bag from him when he’s close enough to do so and places it on the floor. 

“Not right now,” Mizuki tells him, and he only needs to take one more step. Ryo’s arms come up to circle his waist, even though he’s still clearly confused. 

The kiss is awkward for the first few seconds because Mizuki is still smiling, but he settles into it quickly, happiness spreading warmth through his chest as Ryo easily kisses him back. It’s been days since they had the chance to be leisurely about it, and Mizuki wants so much more than that. 

Mizuki lets Ryo kiss him just like that, soft and sweet and slow, until the warmth in his chest has spread all the way out to his fingers and toes and he sighs, relaxed and comfortable in Ryo’s embrace. He pulls back from the kiss to lean his forehead against Ryo’s, just enjoying the closeness as their breaths mingle between them. It’s quiet for a long moment, and then Ryo murmurs something just loud enough for Mizuki to hear it. 

“I love you.”

Mizuki flushes even warmer with happiness. He knew Ryo felt that way, but it’s another thing to hear him say it. 

It’s difficult for Mizuki to get the words out to say it in return, but he wants Ryo to know. 

“Me too,” he manages, and it’s enough. Ryo catches his mouth again and Mizuki clings to him, Ryo’s body solid and grounding in contrast to how his kisses make Mizuki feel lightheaded and dreamy. Unsteady on his feet, Mizuki pulls Ryo over to the couch and tugs him down onto it. When he stretches out, Ryo covers him with his body, pressing him down into the couch all warm and heavy like a comforting blanket. 

When he slides a hand up Mizuki’s side under his shirt, it’s even warmer. Heat spreads out from his touch and Mizuki feels himself grow hot. It’s suddenly more of an effort to breathe. He gasps slightly against Ryo’s mouth…

… and then the door opens. 

Mizuki panics. He’s mostly hidden beneath Ryo, but the sound of the handle turning was enough to warn him, and since he can’t move, he twists sideways as much as he can, turning his face away and burying himself into the back of the couch as much as he can. He prays that he’s hidden from view by Ryo’s body, but he’s clearly not. 

He hears Yuto stammer an apology, something about “earbuds” and “tomorrow” and then the door clicks shut again. 

“...fuck,” Mizuki says into the silence. He sighs, and then squirms a little as Ryo presses a kiss to his neck. 

“Why can’t they know?” Ryo asks, and it’s hard to answer when he’s peppering Mizuki’s skin with little nips and kisses. 

“I don’t know,” Mizuki says, and he’s not sure he could explain himself even if Ryo weren’t being entirely distracting. “It’s just…” 

Awkward, yes. But maybe more than that, it’s that Mizuki likes having Ryo to himself. He likes this secret time, something shared just between the two of them. Not that the other members knowing would really change that, but… 

Mizuki tries to wiggle out from under Ryo so that he can think, but he doesn’t get very far. He only makes it to halfway sitting before Ryo tugs him right back down on top of himself. Mizuki completely gives up, pleased with the way Ryo pulls him in tight, arms around his back and his waist and holding him close like he’ll never let go. 

And Mizuki wants to be even closer. He likes the feel of Ryo’s body against his, the way his lips move with Mizuki’s when he leans up for another kiss. He loves the way he sounds and the way he smells and Mizuki just wants all of him, in every way. He kisses back harder and Ryo makes a surprised noise, but doesn’t push him away. Ryo parts his lips immediately when Mizuki licks at him, searching for more contact.

But even as Mizuki tries to kiss him more deeply, Ryo still seems hesitant somehow, like he’s holding back. It leaves Mizuki wanting more. He wants Ryo to give him everything. Mizuki licks at him, slides their tongues together, and he enjoys the soft noises Ryo makes in response, but it’s not _enough_. Mizuki pushes harder. 

Ryo jerks back when Mizuki nips at him, but when Mizuki glances up, Ryo is staring at him, and his eyes have gone so, so dark.

“ _Mizuki_...” he breathes, and then he captures Mizuki’s mouth so thoroughly that Mizuki is unable to breathe himself. It’s an echo of the first time he kissed him, rough and a little bit desperate, but this time there’s no one watching and no reason to stop. It’s exactly what Mizuki wants. His heart races faster as Ryo slides his tongue into his mouth, flicking in and out between Mizuki’s lips in an insinuation that has Mizuki rocking down against him without conscious thought. 

He’s a little embarrassed when he realizes what he’s done, but then Ryo groans and pushes back. His hands slide down to grasp Mizuki’s hips, and he pulls Mizuki firmly against him and it feels so _good_. The room feels like it’s a thousand degrees and his heart seems like it’s going to pound straight out of his chest. He can feel Ryo hard against him and Mizuki just wants to feel more. 

When Ryo goes for the hem of his shirt, Mizuki doesn’t stop him. He lets him pull it up and off, and Mizuki just wants to feel him. He reaches to return the favor immediately, impatient at the extra seconds it takes for Ryo to lift up off the couch enough to remove his top. But his skin is so warm against Mizuki’s when Mizuki lies back down, and Mizuki can feel the crazy-quick beating of his heart under his palm when he slides a hand between them across Ryo’s chest. He’s glad to know that it matches his own. 

Mizuki wonders how else he feels similar, and suddenly feels the need to explore. He twists to lean down next to him and takes Ryo’s earlobe gently between his lips. It earns him a slight sigh, but not much more, and so he moves on. Kissing his neck gets him small shivers, and Mizuki keeps searching. He finds what he’s looking for when he reaches Ryo’s throat; a kiss to his Adam’s apple sends a full shudder through Ryo’s body beneath him, and Ryo groans. Mizuki can feel the buzz of it on his lips, and Ryo tilts his head back as if to give him better access.

Mizuki keeps it up, licking and sucking until Ryo pushes at his shoulders. 

“Mijukiiiii…” Ryo keeps shivering and Mizuki likes that. He smiles against his skin where Ryo can’t see it and then laps at the hollow of his throat instead. Ryo sighs, his fingers tight where he’s holding on to Mizuki and Mizuki almost wishes he’d squeeze tighter, enough to leave marks. Even as he thinks it, though, Ryo moves his hands to smooth down Mizuki’s back, arching against him to press them together from chest to hips. He tangles their legs together, curling one leg to rest his ankle across Mizuki’s calf, and it’s cute how he tries to twine them together top to bottom. Mizuki lets Ryo pull him close, and he tucks his face into the crook of Ryo’s neck, just breathing in his scent as Ryo shifts below him. Ryo uses any leverage he has to rock up against him and Mizuki forgets any hesitance he might have had. He presses his hips into Ryo’s, slowly, matching Ryo’s rhythm, and the heat burns through him, scorching, Ryo’s fingers hot flames against his back. 

“ _I want you_ ,” Ryo whispers in his ear. “ _Let me touch you_.”

Mizuki nods, and he knows Ryo can feel it. His whole body is tensed in anticipation, waiting to see what Ryo will do. 

It’s not what Mizuki expects at all. 

Instead of pulling him closer somehow, as if that were possible, Ryo actually pushes Mizuki away. Mizuki is confused for a moment as Ryo maneuvers them so that he can sit up, and then he gets a hand in Mizuki’s hair to pull him into an intense, but brief kiss. 

And then he stands up and drags Mizuki with him. 

“Ryo?” Mizuki asks, but he follows when Ryo takes his hand and leads him over to the short hallway at the back of their dressing room. The only things back there are the bathroom and the shower. “Where are we going?”

It’s not a question that needs an answer. 

Mizuki pauses for a moment in front of the shower door. Ryo’s stripping off easily next to him and it shouldn’t be a big deal; Ryo’s seen him naked a thousand times over the years. But this feels very different. Mizuki forces himself to move, because as awkward as he feels about Ryo seeing him hard like this, he also wants him to do a lot more than _see_ him, and that’s going to involve getting his pants off. 

Ryo already has the door open when Mizuki straightens up, and he must have some sense of how Mizuki feels, because he keeps his eyes on Mizuki’s face as he steps aside to make room for him. He’s still watching Mizuki carefully as he shuts the door behind himself, and when he reaches out, it’s to cradle the side of his head in his palm. Ryo pulls Mizuki closer with his other arm around his waist, and although his eyes are still darker than Mizuki’s ever seen them, the look in them is something akin to awe. 

“You’re so beautiful,” Ryo whispers.

Mizuki can’t breathe. His chest feels so tight with love and happiness and he doesn’t deserve this at all. How can he deserve someone as perfect as Ryo? 

He tries to say something, to say anything, to tell Ryo that he’s the best thing in his life, but no words make it past the tightness in his throat. If anything, he feels like he might cry, and so he does the only thing he can and kisses Ryo instead. He presses close along his body and any embarrassment is gone. He just wants to hold him, to touch him and be close to him and never stop.

Ryo’s hands stroke across his back and shoulder, fingers tickling against the hair at the nape of his neck, pressing just firmly enough to avoid tickling as he smoothes along Mizuki’s sides. Mizuki feels like he’s in a sauna, it’s so hot and so hard to breathe, and he breaks their kiss to gasp for whatever air he can manage to get. Ryo drops his head to Mizuki’s shoulder, nipping gently as the base of his throat. And then he works his way slowly down, licking and kissing Mizuki’s bare chest and Mizuki closes his eyes, shuddering. Mizuki feels hypersensitive, goosebumps spreading in ripples from wherever Ryo touches him. And god, all he wants is for Ryo to touch him. He drags Ryo up again, but he’s breathing too hard to really kiss him. 

“Ryo, _please_ ,” he begs, and Ryo tries to kiss him anyway, open-mouthed and messy and perfect. 

“Tell me what you want,” Ryo mumbles against his cheek, but it’s not dirty talk. Mizuki knows he means it; Ryo really will give him anything he wants.

“Touch me,” he demands, and then growls softly when Ryo just trails fingers down his neck. He can’t help the way his eyes flutter shut at the feeling. “Ryo…”

Suddenly Ryo’s warmth disappears and Mizuki nearly whines with displeasure as he opens his eyes. He opens his eyes even wider when he sees where Ryo’s gone - down to his knees in front of him. His breath catches in his throat. 

“Ryo?” 

Ryo steadies himself with a hand on one of Mizuki’s hips and leans his chin on the other, looking up at him. Mizuki already knows what he’s planning even as he asks. 

“I really want to taste you. Can I?” Ryo says, and he tilts his head to mouth at Mizuki’s hip bone, sucking a faint red spot where his chin was just resting. Mizuki braces himself with hands on Ryo’s shoulders and tries to get his breathing under control so that he doesn’t pass out. 

“Have you… before?” he manages to ask. 

Ryo shakes his head. “No,” he says. “But I want to.”

Mizuki shakes his head, too. “You don’t have t—”

“I _want_ to,” Ryo cuts him off. “Please, let me?”

He’s watching Mizuki carefully, waiting, and Mizuki closes his eyes to breathe. Even the idea is enough to make him lightheaded. He looks at Ryo. 

“Okay,” he tells him, and then stops him with a hand on his shoulder again. “Wait, I’m not...” 

Mizuki really isn’t sure he’s going to be able to stay on his feet. He shifts backwards enough to lean against the wall, cringing at the coldness against his back, and hopes it’ll give him a better chance of not ending up in a heap on the floor. Ryo shuffles forward on his knees.

“Okay,” Mizuki says. “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Ryo answers, and gives him a wry grin. “Just don’t expect too much, maybe.”

Mizuki has no idea what to expect, and doesn’t know what to say to that anyway, so he just gets a grip on Ryo’s hair as he leans in. 

The first lick is clearly experimental. Ryo steadies him with his hand, fingers wrapped tightly around the base of his cock as he swipes at the head with his tongue. It’s nothing more than a quick tease, but it’s the visual that really gets to Mizuki. Ryo looks so erotic like this, down on his knees in front of him, eyes half closed and his mouth open for Mizuki’s cock, and Mizuki knows it’s not going to matter how talented Ryo is or isn’t, because just watching him is going to be nearly enough. 

But it turns out that Ryo’s pretty talented after all, at least for his first try. Maybe it’s a lack of self-consciousness, or maybe just a sincere desire to please Mizuki, or maybe it’s a combination of both. He kisses along the side of Mizuki’s shaft and then back down, dragging his lips across his skin before tonguing at the head again. He lets the tip catch on his lower lip, and _fuck_. He has to know what he looks like - he’s definitely showing off. His eyes flick up to meet Mizuki’s stare and he smirks just slightly, and then opens his mouth and takes Mizuki inside.

Ryo doesn’t really use any suction on him, at least not at first. He’s all lips and tongue, messy and wet and _hot_ , bobbing enthusiastically for short spurts and then pulling back to rub Mizuki’s tip across the flat of his tongue. Saliva glistens on his chin and his lips are starting to puff, and the sound of him slurping Mizuki in and out is so lurid that it makes Mizuki blush despite himself. Mizuki takes deep breaths through his nose and tries to stay quiet himself, wanting to hear as much as he can of Ryo’s noises. He’s rewarded with a quiet moan as Ryo closes his eyes and takes him in further, and Mizuki has to fight not to snap his hips forward. He tenses, fingers tightening in Ryo’s hair, and Ryo moans again. 

Mizuki is not going to last very long with Ryo looking and sounding like he does. His hand and mouth on Mizuki aren’t coordinated and it feels a little weird, but it’s still really good, and it’s also really cute that he can’t seem to quite figure it out. Mizuki’s heart does a little flip-flop at that thought, because _god_ , Ryo is so adorable and Mizuki loves him, and suddenly he just wants to pull him up and kiss him senseless. 

Ryo chooses that moment to suck on him, _hard_ , and Mizuki forgets everything in favor of that tight heat surrounding him. Ryo doesn’t take him in very far - can’t, maybe - but sucks on his tip as his hand moves along Mizuki’s length, and Mizuki is suddenly, surprisingly close to coming. Heat washes through him and he shakes with the tension, and he grasps desperately at Ryo’s shoulder to warn him. 

“ _Gonna_ \--” he gasps, pleasure coiling tight and low and he has just enough presence of mind to push Ryo back because he doesn’t want to choke him, doesn’t want to--

Ryo strokes him tightly with his fist, mouth open and still tantalizingly close, and he glances up from beneath long lashes to watch Mizuki, and Mizuki can’t hold it together at all. He comes hard all over Ryo’s bare shoulder, all the tension rushing out and dripping down Ryo’s chest, and Mizuki groans because it’s hotter than anything. Except then, as he slumps against the wall, gasping for air, Ryo swipes a finger through a trail on his skin and then casually licks it, and Mizuki _burns_. 

He pulls Ryo up and yanks him close, heedless of the mess, and then gets both his hands in Ryo’s hair and pulls him into a searing kiss, searching out his own taste on Ryo’s tongue. Ryo whimpers into his mouth, clinging, hands tight on Mizuki’s ribs as he presses himself against him, his erection digging into Mizuki’s hip. 

Mizuki doesn’t have much more experience than Ryo when it comes to giving blowjobs. He’s done it just once - enough to know that he can, and to know that he kind of likes it. He lets go of Ryo, intending to drop down to his knees, but Ryo doesn’t let go of him. He holds Mizuki in place against the wall, hands still tight on his body, and refuses to let him move. 

“Just like this,” he mutters, and pushes against him, kissing Mizuki hard. Mizuki can feel his desire on his tongue, the desperation in his grip. Ryo’s mouth is distracting and Mizuki can’t seem to open his eyes. He feels for Ryo’s bicep and strokes down his arm until he can coax Ryo’s hand off of his side and up to his shoulder. This gives him the room he needs to work his hand between them, and Ryo moans straight into his mouth as soon as Mizuki wraps his fingers around him. Once Mizuki starts moving, Ryo is much too unfocused to keep up the kiss, panting against his lips and flexing into Mizuki’s touch. He shifts his arms up around Mizuki’s head until he’s pulled him close, his cheek pressed to Mizuki’s as he gasps into his ear. He’s clinging so closely that the angle is awkward and Mizuki can’t see what he’s doing at all, but Ryo doesn’t seem to care. 

Mizuki works by touch and by sound, and his breath catches along with Ryo’s, shudders racing through both of them and Mizuki doesn’t know where they start or end. He’s still so sensitive and Ryo’s breaths on his ear are enough to make Mizuki tingle all over. He moves his hand faster, squeezes tighter, and Ryo’s soft moans begin to break, breath hitching on every intake of air, and Mizuki knows he’s close. He waits until Ryo goes tense against him, barely breathing at all, and then he stops. 

It’s just for a moment, just a pause, but it makes Ryo sob, desperate and loud, and Mizuki loves that he sounds that way because of him. He moves again, working Ryo fast, and Ryo’s hips snap as the rest of him goes still. He’s pressed so close that Mizuki can feel how he stops breathing entirely, and then he spills hot over Mizuki’s fingers and thigh. His breath comes back on a harsh groan, and Mizuki twists to catch the end of it with his mouth, using his free hand to grab Ryo’s hair and yank him into place. 

Ryo can’t at all kiss him back, shuddering against Mizuki where they’re pressed knees to chest, and Mizuki doesn’t care. It’s the hottest thing he’s experienced in his entire life, and he’s already looking forward to doing it all again. 

Mizuki holds Ryo close, stroking his hair as his shudders slowly subside and his breathing evens out. There’s an _I love you_ from Ryo that Mizuki only hears because it’s whispered right against his ear, and Mizuki’s not sure if he’s actually telling him, or just giving voice to the thoughts in his head. It makes him feel warm in a whole different way and he turns his head just enough to kiss Ryo’s cheek. 

“You okay?” he asks him softly, slowly disentangling them enough that he can look at Ryo properly. 

Ryo’s smile is small and self-depreciating, but it’s real. 

“Yeah,” he answers. “I’ve… just really wanted that for a very long time.”

Mizuki gives him an answering smile. 

“Well,” he says. “I’m going to keep wanting that for a very long time. So I hope you’re ready.”

“I’m ready to give you forever,” Ryo tells him, and god, it’s such a stupid, dangerous promise. Mizuki leans in to kiss him quiet, too moved to actually speak. 

When Mizuki finally turns on the water to clean them up, it takes ages to get warm. Mizuki almost laughs. It should be awkward - _would_ be awkward with anyone else - but with Ryo he feels comfortable. He smiles at Ryo, who’s leaning against the wall and just watching him. Ryo’s got come smeared on his shoulder and chest and thigh, and maybe on his arms and in who knows what other places from where they were clinging to each other, but he looks entirely unbothered by it. He looks like he’s exactly where he wants to be, with Mizuki, and nothing else matters. 

When the water is finally warm, they take turns rinsing each other off. There’s something special about Ryo touching him like this, intimate in a very different way. Even though Ryo’s hands are on him in places that Mizuki would never allow another person close to, there’s nothing sexual about it. Instead, Mizuki can feel just how much care Ryo takes with him, how much love goes into every one of his motions. He hopes Ryo understands from his touch that Mizuki feels the same. 

They dry off and change, and Mizuki lets out a short laugh when he sees the dressing room. Ryo’s bag is still on the floor, his own on the counter, and nothing is different, except everything is different. Ryo looks at him questioningly but Mizuki just shakes his head, smiling. There’s no way to explain. 

They both grab their things and head out the door, Ryo turning off the lights behind them. The rest of the building is fairly quiet. They say their farewells to the few people they pass. Ryo reaches over and takes his hand for the last ten meters, and then turns to Mizuki when they stop at the main doors. Mizuki waits, and Ryo looks like he’s going to speak, but then he just smiles. There’s nothing that needs to be said. 

Mizuki pushes open the door, and they head out into the night, together.


End file.
